As the mother of a 5-year-old and a 3-year-old, you may think I shouldn't need to worry about my children and financial education just yet.

Not so. Children learn through observation, so how I handle, treat and spend money will be impressed into their little brains sooner than most people realize.

For this reason, I'm trying to teach my children the importance of saving money, proper "handling" techniques (where you should and shouldn't put your money, wash your hands after handling it, etc.) and the ever-important concept of "need versus want."

The problem is, it seems society is against my teaching methods. You see, not only have my children witnessed acquaintences spending frivolously (or have heard our friends discussing), but members of our own family (grandparents, aunts, uncles) also show very little discipline with their money.

It is increasingly difficult to teach children respect for money in today's world. They are bombarded with commercials and advertisements for toys and "things" they "have to have!" or "can't live without!" as the ads emphatically state. Our children's grandparents have bought into these ads big time. One set of grandparents even went so far as to outright state that we were harming our children by not giving them "everything they desire."

Yet, I've found our 5-year-old seems to understand that money is to be "saved" and respected. That there are things he needs (clothing, food, shelter) that money buys, yet there are also things he does not necessarily need that money could buy (things like toys, stuffed animals, candy, fast-food kiddie meals with "free" prizes). He is beginning to understand that if he saves his allowance now (he gets $.50 a week), he will soon have "a lot" of money. At that point, we will encourage him to open a savings account at our credit union (because banks charge fees for just about everything and few credit unions do). Of course, he'll learn to spend money too -- our method of teaching will be that we put a certain percentage or amount in savings and that some may be spent.

Woman's Day magazine reports in their March 7, 2000, issue the average allowance for 8 and 9 year-olds is $3.74, and for 10 and 11 year olds, it jumps to about $5 (p. 167). I know of a grandfather who gives his 7-year-old grandson $10 a week! Now, I'm not sure just what this 7-year-old is doing with this money, whether they are attempting to instruct him about savings, spending, etc., or if they're just taking him shopping every week. I do know, however, that this particular family tends to spend more than they should on wants, play-things and frivolous purchases.

Our society currently seems to have little respect for money and very little discipline where finances are concerned. Parents who are spend-thrifts and who buy every little thing that catches their eye will teach their children that same lifestyle. Parents who are frugal and who make wise decisions regarding money matters will teach their children to also be smart regarding finances.

It's up to you, as a parent, to discover just how you view and consequently treat your money: do you spend everything you take in or do you manage to save a great deal of it for future use? Do you go on weekly shopping trips to the mall or shops, to window shop and browse, and end up spending a lot of money... or do you avoid window shopping and malls, knowing that, while the temptation is always available, you are surviving just fine without another black blazer?

Once you figure out your own attitude toward finances, you can better decide how you wish your children to be. This may mean you realize you are a spend-thrift, and if you think you want your children to understand finances and savings, you may need to change your ways. But it may not be easy.

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W. Lomano is responsible for The Stay-at-Home Parents page www.geocities.com/sahmlomano/index2.html.